When I was writing my profile for iDateTranssexual, I think I must have tried three or four times to get it to say what I really wanted. I tried starting the first paragraph with “Transsexual woman…” then “Trans woman…” and also “T-girl…”. I then wrote a couple of sentences to describe me and what I was looking for in a relationship with a man. I also wrote about some of my goals and objectives in life. I didn’t want to write too much as I expected that anyone who contacted me would want to ask all sort of questions.
When finally I felt happy with what I’d written, I saved the file on my laptop and decided to look at it again later that evening. Sometimes when you see things you have written again, you can improve upon them. After looking again that night, I pondered for a while and decide to take out all references to “Transsexual”, “Trans” and “T-girl”. I am emotionally and mentally a female and always have been since I can remember. I may have been born with an extra body part and no ovaries but, hey, there are genetic women with more complicated situations!
So, I uploaded my profile, together with several photographs of me I really like, iDateTranssexual. I wasn’t really sure what to expect, although I had been warned by some friends who also use the site that most men ask so many questions when they first get in touch.
When I checked my profile on the site the next night, there were over 30 messages in my inbox. Yes, I was surprised, but also expected that a fair few of them would be time-wasters and curiosity seekers. I know that the Admin staff of the dating site do their best to screen out non-genuine people, but this is really hard owing to the volume of members. Plus, how do you really know in advance what questions men will ask?
Anyway, I read through all of the messages I had received. Then, I decided to make a template in a Word document of responses so that I could cut and paste my answers for whoever was asking. I grouped the questions into two main categories but with fairly arbitrary headings. I used “Body and education, hobbies and interests” and “Really, he asked that?”
As I started on my replies I wondered aloud if all women, never mind just Transsexual women or T-girls, get these sorts of questions from potential daters.
So, without any further delay, here are a selection of some of the questions I received, together with some of my (short) answers. You may not have seen my profile, but much of the main information to answer the questions was in there. It just goes to show that people only tend to read what they want to!
[I thought about not answering this one, but did finally]
35-25-37; great shape, huh?
[I thought about not answering this one at all, but answered the first part]
I have a Bachelor’s degree in technology and am studying for a Masters in Computer Science
what are your hobbies and interests?
I like to rollerblade and ice skate. I play many sports and enjoy listening to music
I am interested in meeting and getting to know genuine intelligent men
Really, he asked that? Most of these I couldn’t convince myself to answer. Bear in mind that these are a selection of men’s first response to my profile being listed oniDateTranssexual
You know, I am a pragmatist. I understand that there are all sorts of people in the world with different ways of asking questions. Many men know something about Trans women but not always enough. Some of the questions come from ignorance or lack of awareness. But my belief is that you should only ask a question which you would be comfortable asking in a face to face environment and to someone who you know reasonably well. Even then, to many T-girls, some questions are just too personal to asks until you know them really well
So, next time you want to contact a Transsexual beauty on iDateTranssexual reread your questions before you send them to her. You might find yourself better thought of all round…